No more dude

So, I haven't really written about "the dude" here, but I think it's about time to at least put some feelings on the table. no "the dude" is not awesome like the big lebowski, he sucks actually. I don't even think it's because he's my mom's boyfriend, I don't think I would dislike just anyone, but this dude drives me crazy, I guess it's partially not his fault.

First problem, my mom is still married and she has a boyfriend and has had one for like 5 or 6 years, I know gross. She won't get a divorce and since my dad isn't the one who "left" he doesn't want on either since he knows he'll have to give mom money, house, or whatever. The thing is, my dad used to live in the house because it was my mom who wanted to leave. My brother went kinda nutty his sophomore year and so my mom moved back in and my dad went to an apartment. My dad couldn't afford to pay for an apartment and a house (my mom was paying for the apartment but then stopped) so he had to move out and now lives in a room in somebody's house while paying for the house we live in. Ok, not really that big of a deal, lots of guys have to do that, the issue? The dude basically lives here. He has his own house, but he sleeps here every night, I have to see his scrubby ass come down the stairs every morning which usually results in waking up Abigail (making me pretty angry). He basically steals my mom from me too. My mom has always been a smoker, but the dude is a heavy duty smoker and since she's been with him she smokes A LOT more than before. It's nice that she only smokes upstairs so it's not around Abigail, but I hardly ever see my mom. Her and the dude go have a smoke like every 15-30minutes. He is also her dance partner and so they go to dance lessons and dances during the week and on the weekend. Now, it's all good that my mom goes out and has fun, but she goes out a lot and it out really late, yet when she doesn't go out she goes to bed all early because she's tired and will not hang out with me. typically she'll get home from work say hi to Abigail and then go get ready to go out. I see her about 15 minutes a day, yet she said she's all sad that we are leaving soon, maybe she should stay home more so we can hang out. The dude also does not respect my moms diet at all, i sweat i don't know how that guy isnt 400lbs, he eats like crazy. My mom has been doing the Atkins diet for about 7 years or so and even thought i dont think it's the best diet it has worked for her, so basically she isn't supposed to eat carbs right? Apparently this dude is Alton Brown or some shit and makes tons of stuff my mom cant eat, usually dessert and makes her eat it. What did he make for dinner last night? Freakin spaghetti and breadsticks! What the hell? I feel bad because I know my mom s upset about it, but she doesn't say anything. He also butts his head in everything, telling me what i should be feeding abigail and stuff, him and my mom even gave her ice cream when she was babysitting, I was pretty pissed about it, not because of the ice cream but maybe I wanted to be there when she tried ice cream the first time. I don't want that guy and his dirty hands touching my abigail, he is seriously so freakin dirty. My mom doesn't even ask if it's ok, I should just tell her, but I don't want to make my mom mad, she is no fun at all for days on end if she's mad. The dude also eats my pizza. Sounds stupid but see I will order a pizza every once in awhile and save leftover for lunch the next day. Him and ma will come to the house in the middle of the night and fatty will eat the rest of my pizza. I have even puts notes on it before. First of all, it's not his house, and it's not his pizza I freakin paid for it! It'd be different if he asked, like "Hey can I have a piece of your pizza?" but no he just eats it, and not just a piece, the whole thing and he thinks it's funny. He has cracked jokes about how he ate my pizza. The other day Amanda ordered the pizza and he came in the house and at two pieces! grrr On top of that my sister is getting married next summer and my dad, mom and the dude need to get this figured out before then. Holidays are already weird because now we go with the dude to my aunt's house. My dad and the dude haven't met. If my mom and dad had just settled this 5 years ago it'd be no big deal by now. My dad cant even come to family functions because the dude is there and mom won't let them collide. My cousin Gary got married i think two years ago and my dad couldn't come. Now you have to realize Gary is like another son to my dad, my mom and dad have been married like 25 years my dad has no brothers or sisters and so my moms brothers and sisters are his family and now he is cut off. My uncle died and he couldnt come to the funeral. I mean, seriously. Well, I'm done for now, my rage is building up. I will stop for now, but I think you can get the idea. Nighty night!

I love my husband

So, I know it's obvious, but I really do love my husband. We have always been a strong couple, but this deployment has really shown us how strong we really are. He sends me the sweetest emails and letters you could ever read. It just makes me feel good to be loved by someone as much as he loves me. It's crazy. I can't wait until he is finally home and we can be normal again. It can't come soon enough.

Things are starting to move along with the whole moving back to Washington thing. Well, I say that yet I haven't really made any progress. I almost had a house a week and a half ago, but then the lady sold it. I applied for a house in Dupont, but now we are thinking it doesn't really work for us. Then I called about a few other places, but have been disappointed over and over again. For example, no fenced yard even though it says fenced yard, people have decided not to rent but rather to sell, or the house is already taken. I finally found a place that I think would be perfect for us. I called and asked if it was available, they said yes, so I started getting all excited, sent in an application, they said everything looked good but we'd know for sure in 24 hours, then about 5 minutes later I get a call saying there was a miscommunication and they had promised another couple the first showing of the house on Monday at 10am. So, now I gotta wait until then to find out. Meanwhile, I have tried getting another house lined up. I guess I wouldn't mind the backup house and I'm prepared for it since i've been let down so far. It's in a really nice neighborhood, smaller, but cheaper. It doesn't have a real yard, it has a patch of grass and patio that is fenced in, but it is right next to a couple parks and trails, so it'd be nice for us.

I just want it to be over so I can start making more plans. I need to book movers, get a trailer for the truck, book flights, pack things, and who knows what else, I have a very long list. I know I still have to figure out how to get from the airport to the storage unit to get my car. I'm gonna have to jump it so I'll need someone with a car and jumper cables, even though I might have some in the car, I'm not sure.

Well, I'll go now, just wanted to share a little.

So confused

So, I have been having this back and forth dilemma regarding my dogs for quite awhile now. Just thinking about doing another move with the dogs is making me tired. Plus, Vinnie and I are going to want to take a trip and we'll either have to board them all or get a pet-sitter or something. If we were normal, like we had planned to be when we got the dogs, I could handle them, we wouldn't be living across the country wanting or needing to come home every once in awhile or have to move because the Army says so or desperately need a vacation because we have been separated for a year. But, that's not what happened. I LOVE my dogs, I really do, I wish I were a better owner, but things just haven't gone the way we thought they were going to go when we went crazy and ended up with three dogs. If only we had stopped at Hoosier things would be ok, but Yoda was so irresistibly cute, I'm not kidding and I know we saved Charles from being euthenized, no one wanted him and it was so sad. We really shouldn't have gotten a third dog but really the difference of 2 and 3 isn't much. One dog would be so much easier. I just don't want to give them up forever because i know someday we will be settled again and be normal and then I would want my puppies back. I wouldn't want a stranger to have them because I'd be scared they'd end up at a shelter. I just need a couple friends or family members to take one or both of my doggies into their home. They are good dogs, for real. It would be like an open adoption, I want to be able to see pictures and stuff and then if I feel i'm ready to have them back I could come get them. I know that isn't really realistic. That's why it's so frustrating. Well, that's all i'm gonna write tonight, i need to go to sleep i'm so tired but thoughts of everything keep running through my mind and I can't settle down!