Friday, December 31, 2010
I don't know if I will ever go anywhere for New Years, it doesn't seem like it. I don't even know if I want to, but I do wish I could go back to college sometimes, I miss it so much.
Sometimes I think I want to go back to civilian life, but I don't think I could give up all the army benefits. I don't know if Vinnie could find anything that pays like the Army. Well, I guess I'll go now. Happy New Year!
Tuesday, December 28, 2010
Thought I'd do some sort of a post about Christmas. It went well, had some fun, but totally drained me.
Well, I was going to upload pictures, but it doesn't want to work so maybe next time.
Abigail got a vacuum and a kitchen and a play tent. Those are by far her favorite toys.
no news on the baby front yet. We shall see. I am still stressed about future names, I know I'm crazy, but nothing I can do about that.
Vinnie really likes the name Jack, as time goes on I like it less and less. I just don't see it as very formal and it seems too simple. I don't know..I mean it's alright, but I love calling Abigail by her full name and Jack just doesn't seem full. I like the name Benjamin, but maybe not enough for a first name. I like the name Alexander, but not Alex. I'm starting the like the name William, will for a nickname. Thing is, Jack doesn't bother me as a nickname, just not a given name. Not really a fan of Jackson, seems too trendy. any opinions out there?
Girls, well, I have a lot of first names. I really am 98% sure I would go with Elizabeth, it's my sister's middle name and my g-g-ma's so that's be nice. Middle name, not sure. My usual naming technique is my own first name and family middle name, but I mess that up with Elizabeth, but I like it as a first name. I don't want to use my other names like Caroline as a middle name, although maybe it'd be better as a middle name since I don't like Carol for a nn that people might give her. Elizabeth Caroline? hmm Also, as I mentioned before, trying to use a form of Mildred somewhere. I could use just Millie, doesn't sound right for a middle name though. I know there are other names that get you Mille as a nickname, Amelia being one of theme. Well, I guess I'll go for now, hopefully I'll be able to put some pics up later.
Thursday, December 16, 2010
I like Jack, but I'm not a super huge fan. I think it bothers me that Jack is actually a nickname for John, although I realize nowadays it can stand alone, it is also becoming very popular. I might get frustrated if/when other people ask what Jack is short for and I have to say he's just Jack, I think that might make me sad. Now we could pick John, which is a cute name, not a huge favorite, but it could be cute and we could call him jack and he could also have more options with his name if he wanted. We could also call him John John. Would it be weird to have a John and Abigail? I don't think people would notice. I always liked Benjamin, it has always been on my baby names lists (except the ones with only A's and E's) but it seemed like a random name, but now I know my dad’s grandpa’s name was Benjamin and now I’m excited. I really super like it,
Middle names: Christopher, Kevin, John, Jack, Benjamin
1. Eli: (I still LOVE eli) Eli Christopher Eli Kevin, Eli Christopher Kevin, Eli Benjamin
2. Benjamin: Benjamin Christopher, Benjamin Jack
3. John "Jack" Christopher, John “Jack” Benjamin, John “Jack” Christopher
4. Jack: Jack Christopher, Jack Benjamin
Middle names: Elizabeth, Alice, Margaret, Katharine, Millie, Milly
Elizabeth Jean, Elizabeth Margaret, Elizabeth Katharine (Ellie or Lily), Elizabeth Millie?
I think I like Elizabeth Katharine best, but I’d like to work on more names since I don’t think you like it.I really need to work on some more names. You why I obsess? It's because I don't have any official names yet. I really need to work on girls names now.
I know Caroline Elizabeth sounds kinda nice, but I really want elizabeth as a first name (it is my sisters's middle name and my g-grandma's middle name. I also want to try to work some form of mildred into a middle name. Vinnie's grandma's name was Mildred and neither of us like that name but would really like to honor his grandma by using it in some way. I know there are a lot of names that have Millie as a nickname which is what we may do since she was known as millie.
Thursday, December 9, 2010
Today was pretty lazy, boring, didn't do anything. When i got back from this meeting I was starving and Abigail was tired and when she gets tired she turns self-destructive, falling over, running into things, etc, so I thought I might be able to get some food in before taking her to bed, but she had other plans. Usually I give her a bath but we skipped it tonight and now she has woken up about an hour after i put her to bed. Hopefully she'll go back to bed, if not, it could be a long night. I shouldn't mess with her routine, but I was hungry! Then Vinnie fell asleep so it's just me again. Well, Apprentice finale is on tonight, so i'm pretty pumped. This is the first time I have ever watched that show, it's not bad, kinda funny, Trump is a funny dude.
Vinnie mentioned something about seeing if there are any jobs in Ft. Knox. I'm not going to put too many eggs in that basket. I need to get his approval on our Christmas card thingy and calendar, and i want to ask him about the career course, but never seem to get a chance.
Also been trying to talk to someone about babies, but no one is interested. It's understandable in some people's cases but others like my sister drive me nuts. If I even mention babies she tells my mom I'm having a baby. No, not having one, just want to talk about having one maybe, someday again. Maybe I'll start talking babies on here, but I don't want to drive away my only reader!
Ok, this was really boring,but oh well. Have a good night. Oh and the Colts finally won
Monday, December 6, 2010
Sunday, December 5, 2010
Nothing else really going on. We put up Christmas lights. It's looking quite Clark Griswold out there but that's fine with me. I'll have to take a picture sometime. The inside looks nice too. Already picked up a couple presents for Abigail. I'm so glad vinnie is home this Christmas. We are trying to think of traditions we'd like to have in our little family. We have some ideas. I'll share them later since I'm on my phone right now and just don't feel like typing it all out. Well. I'm gettin tired I'll add more later. Just thought I'd do a little update.
***Ok, I'm back, doing a no-no which is bringing the computer in bed with me. I know it is the culprit to my insomnia, but so be it. Anyway, my mom was here for a visit which was super fun. We had a good time, went winter shopping, yay! I didn't have ANY winter clothes being I was at least 40lbs heavier last year this time. Got to see a couple movies while she was here and went out to eat with the hubster for my birthday, so good times. My dad is also coming for a visit next week, so I'm excited about that as well.
So, going to another coffee Tuesday. Look at me, miss social, although I wouldn't go that far. I just am not naturally social unless someone opens up to me first and even then it may not work. There are some people I just naturally connect with, and other well, not so much, but I'm sure that's true for everyone.
As I mentioned Vinnie and I got to see a couple movies, including the new Harry Potter. Now neither of us have ever been Harry Potter enthusiasts or anything, not that we didn't like it, just never got into it. Anyway, thanks to Harry Potter weekend on ABC family and our DVR we are now officially caught up. To tell you the truth, I saw the Half-Blood Prince in theaters after only reading the first book (class assignment) and really I didn't miss much, besides Harry getting beat up and about 6 defense against the dark arts professors. Seriously, does Dumbledore (don't know if i spelled that right) not know how to hire someone of quality for that job or what?
Still wanting to join a gym, still debating. I'm guessing it won't happen because I'm too big a wuss to ask 100 times if I can. Just don't know. I'd like to get back into decent shape before we think about trying for baby #2.
Oh yeah, Christmas traditions. Well, so far the Christmas lights are a go. We want to get a pickle ornament and hide it in the tree. We are going to go to church Christmas eve, I just couldn't imagine not going. I think I'm going to make some cookies and possibly cupcakes for Christmas. Have to read night before Christmas. Christmas morning I think I will do cinnamon buns and possibly some biscuits and gravy. Not sure what else. Probably do a Christmas dinner. Need to watch all the Christmas movies at some point. We wanted to make going to Trans-Siberian orchestra a tradition, but apparently they were here like November 13th. So, oh well.
alright, well if anyone has any suggestions let me know.
Friday, November 19, 2010
My house is a mess bc I'm just too tired to get anything done and that just makes me more depressed. I don't get out of the house (again I know that's my own fault) but where am i supposed to go and again I don't have the motivation. That's why I was so pumped to join a gym but now I'm just back to blah about it because Vinnie wasn't really for it. I don't even really want to anymore. Also, I don't do anything for myself, ever, I mean I don't get my hair cut, or dyed, I don't get my nails done or go buy new clothes or things I want. All I wanted was to go to the gym so I don't gain my weight back and so I can hopefully start to feel better. I will talk to my mom and she always understands exactly what i'm talking about, maybe because she has been there, but I can never explain it to Vinnie. Ugh, I love my husband and he is awesome, we just have to find a way to get on the same page sometimes, and again it doesn't help that he constantly tells me he wishes he could just stay home and hang out with Abigail all day... yeah ok :( it's mostly on me because I don't take care of myself and just get things done that need to be done.
I don't know when I became this way, I mean I got everything done in college, then once I moved out here I just have made excuse after excuse for everything and it makes me feel like a terrible and lazy human being all the time. I know the easy solution is well then do something (which is what vinnie says) but I can't seem to do ANYTHING. I don't know why but I think if I were home in a familiar place and surrounded by my family things would be different. Well, that's all for now, going to try to "sleep" again...
Wednesday, November 17, 2010
Oh, we went on this marriage retreat which was awesome and I made a couple new friends, so now I have a 2-1 buddy I can drag around to all this army stuff. Ok, well, probably should go to bed, but won't so nighty night
Friday, October 29, 2010
I guess it doesn't hurt to do the interview right? Good practice. But, why leave Abigail, I can't get the image of saying bye to her out of my head, it's making me sad.
On another note the boys are going to be adopted. They are coming to get them Sunday and so yep, I'm sad, but I think they will be happier. I'm tired now, I hope I get this figured out.
Wednesday, October 20, 2010
Anyway, looks like Vinnie is staying in the Army. We crunched the numbers a little bit and it looks like it would be best for us, we could eliminate all our debt in a couple years (except my stupid school loans) and he might have an opportunity to get law school paid for and it's just a security thing, I mean, he has this job, great benefits, decent pay, no chance of a lay off, holidays off, etc. Of course there are downsides or everyone would be in the Army. So, I am just going to roll with it and try to stop planning and worrying so much about the future.
I kinda wish we weren't in WA anymore. I mean, I absolutely love it here, but it is WAY to far from home for me, anywhere besides Alaska, Hawaii and overseas would be closer. Eh, well, we'll see. Well, I'm not quite in the mood for typing so I will maybe update more later and get more exciting with some pictures.
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
Still don't know if Vinnie is staying in or getting out which makes things that much more confusing. In about two or three years my sister said I could job share with her, that would be cool. What do I do until then? I just need some ideas I guess or something.
I know Vinnie doesn't really get alone time, but I don't get any either, I miss working out. I need to do it again, going to the gym was always the best part of my day, now my day pretty much sucks, it drags on and I feel like I get nothing done bc I'm so freaking tired all day bc I can't sleep at night. Something needs to change, but I need a simple solution, I'm not going to run around like crazy anymore (getting my WA cert, applying, getting all the req. paperwork) for something I don't even really want deep down right now. I'd like to continue to develop my portfolio, make a real professional one, do some professional development, keep up on the times, etc. I'm not really sure where to start.
So, I keep going back and forth on what I think we should do about the whole army thing, today I think I'm leaning toward getting out and going home. I miss my family sooooooo much, I hate being so far away. Everyone is missing out on Abigail growing up, I have no close friends here and only two/three people in the whole state that I know and would feel comfortable hanging out with. It's my fault for not getting out there and making it happen, but being home I would have at least a support network which I know I could get here if I seek it but I don't think I would. I don't know what I need. My life isn't terrible or bad in any sense, it's just not what I thought it'd be. I don't even know what I thought it would be.
I guess this is what I thought. I'd be teaching and Vinnie would be in law school, this would be his last year of law school in fact, then he'd get a lawyer job, I'd have 2 years of teaching done and then we could start a family. Of course things got all crazy when he joined the Army, he couldn't find a "real" job after college and didn't want to go straight to law school after IU so he joined so he could support me, which I really do appreciate. About a year in we decided we were financially stable enough to start a family (i think at the time we were pretty certain the army would be our lives for a long while). So, now we are at the crossroads which could have been avoided, I know you can't plan out everything, but some things you can plan and if we had stayed on the plan I thought we were on I think things would be very different, I don't know if they'd be better, I know any path would have brought it's own challenges.
I'm afraid that I will get so used to this stay at home thing that I will never get out there again and seek anything. I think about how this life could end tomorrow, so why am I putting so many things off until later? I just don't want to lose myself I guess...
I need to figure out something, I'm feeling tears coming on for some reason, why? I'm not like sad and depressed or anything, I just wish I could figure things out. ugh...
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Maybe I'll find something, but I'll need somewhere for Abigail to go...and what if I want to have another baby? I guess that is out of the question now since we won't have money anymore. I'm really stressed out about this whole thing. I'm always online looking for jobs for me and Vinnie, it doesn't seem like Vinnie is stressed about it at all, but it is kind of a big deal. I am so bipolar about the whole thing. I love being home and just being a mom and I know someday later I can teach, and right now I should just stay at home with my babies, but then if Vinnie gets out that's not possible. I really do want to teach and I know I will. at least now i can keep renewing my license by taking some classes or doing professional development, which would be good for me anyway. Someday I really wish I could have my own classroom, I feel like I wasted all the work I did in college watching people I graduated with and people who graduated after me going on to bigger and better things when every prof I had told me how wonderful a teach I would be and how I literally kicked everyone's ass in those classes I took, yet, they have the jobs, I know they didn't get married or have kids (although some do now). Maybe I did things backwards, I know according to mom's plan did, she always told us college, career, married, babies...I kinda f*ed that up and now it's biting me in the bum. I just have to wait to have a career. I almost feel like I had a baby in high school or college and couldn't finish my degree. Funny thing is that the people who did have babies in high school and college are doing just fine and their babies are old enough now that they are finishing school now and getting jobs..
wow, tangent. sorry. But you see my point. My brain is a mess. Maybe I just need counseling and someone to tell me what I should do. I know every year when school starts I'm going to get the urge again...no matter what I decide. When I see job openings I can't help but want them.
Maybe I should just whip out some babies now and then when they are all in school try to be a teacher again...sigh, sounds like a long time. Even if I started now, ok, new baby wouldn't be born until late june/july...ok then add 3-4 years to that, so we're talking 5 years, and if I want another one and go for it when the 2nd one is about 2 then that's another 3-4 years or so, so probably like 8-10 years before I teach...ugh You see my problem? I am crazy.
The point is I have no idea what I want. DO I want to give up time with my babies to go hang out with someone else's babies? I feel like I should have waited until my babies were in school to go to college, that would have made more sense, maybe, I don't know, that's what a lot of people do these days and you usually think they don't have their stuff together, but maybe they are smarter than all of us? hmmm....
OK, I'll leave you alone, I know you have a job and it's a doosy. Oh, shower date sounds good, I hope I can find a really ridiculous old bridesmaid dress. I'll start planning now. Weeeeeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Sunday, September 12, 2010
Looks like Vinnie plans to get out, he kinda gave me a run-down on what he kinda sees us doing in the future and it sounded ok, at least with teaching you get time off and you can take time when you have kids, I hate the idea of not being home with my kids to go teach other kids, but there is a chance to do job-sharing with my sister in the future, so we shall see about that.
Well, I'm sleepy, but can't sleep. I guess I'm going to try.
Saturday, September 11, 2010
Vinnie likes the Army, I think he just isn't really enjoying being gone for what seems like the entire day, he maybe sees Abigail for 1/2 hour before she goes to bed. Maybe that is part of it.
I just don't know... what am I going to do? There's no way for me to know if there will be anything back home for me. I hope so, but I probably need to find something here to beef up the resume.
So, back to square one...
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Anyway, I absolutely LOVE football season and no other time more than Sunday Night Football. Why you ask? Yes, the Colts are on it quite often (again didn't used to be that way, we'd be lucky to catch a couple games on TV if we were able to tune into the South Bend channel) but the real reason I love Sunday Night Football is because in college, every weekend, my goal was to have ALL of my work done by Sunday Night Football, I'm talking everything, including studying. So, I always did it and by the time the song started, no matter what, the books closed and I relaxed and had no more cares. So, even now, when I hear the song start I get a smile on my face and I am soooooooooooo happy. Oh I can't wait until Sunday, but tonight's game should also be awesome, even though I don't really want to hear about Favre and his stupid ankle and how he's old nor do I want to hear about how the Saints won the Superbowl and somehow saved New Orleans, but if I have to watch on mute, I will.
So here's to football, a true American treasure...
Wednesday, September 8, 2010
Well I finally got an email from North Thurston County Public Schools that my application is finally complete and available to hiring administrators. Sweet, since school started today! Anyway, there are still 3 positions open if the website is accurate, maybe I'll get a call, I'm not expecting anything since I have nothing on my resume since 2008 and all my spelling errors, those go right to the shredder, but maybe they won't notice? yeah right. Well, I might get prepped for an interview just in case, still need to work on my portfolio, I probably won't have a super awesome one, but I'll have something, I'm just not in the mood to put the effort in right now.
Oh and Vinnie comes home today and asks me if I'd be able to get a job back home if he gets out, I said I don't know why, and he said, that's not an answer. A few minutes later he said Ok i'm getting out and we are moving home. Well, that isn't the first time that has been said, so I don't know if he was serious or what, I'm sure we'll chat more tonight...
Another option is to be a teacher's assistant...paid. There are actually a couple of openings on post, the hours are good, not too many, and I'd be paid so I can better justify child care. One opening is only like 3 hours a day which would be perfect. Right now I'm trying to get info on how to apply, it's kinda confusing. I think that could be good though.
Also, I'm going to try to work out on post instead of Globo Gym. I think I can "make it work"
On another note, I finally found a good website where I can find professional development conferences for teachers! I found a freakin awesome one in Washington, not super far away. $125 but it's all about reading and literacy instruction, which would be great and the keynote guy is the main guy we focused on in my final methods class. So, I think I may have to go for that.
I got about 2 hours of sleep last night. I need to figure this out, I hate not sleeping, I feel terrible all day and I can't blame Abigail anymore... well, I need to try to get some rest while abigail is relaxing, oh wait nope, she's up
Tuesday, September 7, 2010
On a better note I had lunch with a friend today and it was nice, haven't hung out since the boys got back and now she's moving :( If we stay in I'll be following her to Benning so that's cool. She has been a real mentor for me, I don't know if I would have made it this far as an army wife without her! Ok nighty night!
I think it will be hard to ever get a teaching job being I will never be anywhere for long enough to "get my foot in the door" which is the only way to get a teaching job in a place where you know no one. Most teachers get there first job bc of student teaching, usually offered a long-term sub position followed by a full time gig. I was offered Kindergarten maternity leave and another Kindergarten position following student teaching, BUT I had to move to Washington. Things would be very different if we weren't in the Army, so weird to think about, I would have taken that job... no Abigail, at least not yet.
I would make an attempt at getting my foot in the door here but it seems pointless since i won't be here long enough to reap the benefits.
So the never ending stay in or get out topic came up again today... ugh, I just don't know. All I know is I feel useless around here. I don't know how I can make this "job" better. It doesn't help that when I ask Vinnie what he wants to do he says "stay at home with Abigail" yeah i know it sounds like all fun and games, but it's exhausting and you are trying to get 80 things done during the day and end up only getting maybe 2 things done which makes you feel like a failure. It isn't all that fun, plus you have nothing to show for what you did all day. When the hubby comes home and asks what I did all day I really don't have anything to say and I hate that, If I had a job I would automatically feel useful, right now, I just feel lazy and I know I'm not. Well, I'm tired and need to sleep, but who knows if that'll happen
Monday, September 6, 2010
Anyway, I think maybe I have decided to just enjoy the opportunity I have to stay at home, not everyone these days has that as a choice. I just am not that good of a house wife, I can't help but feel like a crappy janitor and terrible cook pretty much everyday. I'm really not good at it and I get into caring for Abigail and all of the sudden Vinnie will be home soon and I haven't done anything and so I feel like I am not contributing anything. I think maybe if I just stop thinking about the job thing and concentrate on being a wife and mom I could do better.
I do need to try to get out more, staying at home is what is driving me crazy. I'd like to start working out again too. We shall see.
I'm wondering if I could find some teacher workshops or maybe even volunteer in a classroom a couple times a week? hmm, that could be an idea, it would get me in the classroom even if I don't get paid, oh well. I should check into that.
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Below is the word wall from my 3rd grade class. I miss them too! They are 6th graders! Now I'd really like to be a college prof, but I kinda screwed myself with an el ed major, because I would not want a masters in el ed or anything related to education, I would want a PHD in history, BUT it might be impossible to find a program that will take me as an el ed major, the only math I had was 3 semesters of "teacher math" which actually was kinda hard even if i got A+ s in the classes, other people failed so... and my science classes were hard and normal science classes but I'm probably screwed because they are for "Elementary teachers" great...waste of time, wanna know what the difference is? You write a freakin unit plan in an el ed biology or physics class and you learn how to TEACH that craziness to others, I feel like it was probably harder than a normal class, but what can you do. Also, no foreign language was required, even though I took some, but I am in no way fluent, and to get into grad school for history you have to be able to read and write in a foreign language...sigh...
Anyway, that was a tangent. Basically I have no clue. Maybe I should just try to be the best wife and mom I can be and just leave it at that. For some reason, it just doesn't feel right, or it just doesn't feel like what I am supposed to do... it just wasn't where I saw myself, I know life changes your plans and you can't control everything.
Every day that goes by I feel like I'm losing my teaching mojo. I mean, not to toot my own horn, but I freakin rule, I mean I am the shiz, at least I was, ideas and things i learned are becoming harder to remember and I'm already starting to feel out of date when I used to be ahead of the game (being that IU is a research school so we always had the latest teaching theories). ugh, well, this post is going nowhere. I think I'm done, I quit, I'll just be goody good-wife and maybe an FRG leader (yeah, I was "offered" it and I know nothing about it)- imagine me all FRG leader like...haha, I don't have the social skills for that one. OK i'm done, nighty night
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Sunday, August 15, 2010
We really want to live in Chicago...someday, I would LOVE it! Of course being in the Army doesn't really offer that option, so if we want to live in Chicago now, easy answer, get out, BUT could/would Vinnie be able to find a job? Would we be able to afford a condo/house? (We still have quite a bit of debt) would I be able to get a teaching job that would pay enough to offset daycare in CHICAGO and pay my loans back? I would also need to transfer my teaching license and take at least another test so I can be certified in Middle school subjects..at least social studies. Also, I feel like going this route would get us stuck and Vinnie would probably never get a chance to go to law school like he has always wanted to so that would stink.
We COULD live at home while Vinnie goes to law school, that way we could save some money and I could also try to get a job and get the experience and use my Indiana license which would be a plus. But, we all know how crappy living at home was for me...
We could also get a cheap apartment and Vinnie could go to law school and I could see if I could work, just sucks with the dogs...
Of coarse all the above options involve me going back to work which I'm not totally sure I want to do yet, but at times I really do want to, but I don't know.
So, Vinnie could stay in, this would allow us time to save up money for all the things we want to do...
We aren't sure what the commitment is if he stays in and goes to Captains Career Course, but probably a few years which of course put us at risk for another deployment. I could also start teaching while Vinnie is in the Army, that would definitely help with the debt. There is a lot of "security" with staying in the Army, you can't beat the insurance and other benefits, and I'd be worried about losing all of those things, there is no guarantee of any job outside the Army.
Vinnie wants to apply for a program through the Army that would pay for him to go to law school, problem is they only take about 15 people each year, so it is pretty selective. But, if he were to get in it would be awesome.
well, I'm tired so I'm not going to finish this tonight, but if anyone has any thoughts let me know!
Saturday, August 14, 2010
I'll add pictures but for now I'll just discuss a few things we did. We flew Alaskan Airlines early in the morning to Oahu, Abigail did awesome, of course she is an awesome little one and flying in planes is second nature now. We got there and checked into the Waikiki Marina Resort at the Illikai, which I would recommend to anyone, full kitchen, on the part of Waikiki that isn't super crowded, close to shopping and you get picked up first for everything. It was WAY cheaper than the Hale Koa, which we frequented for the PX, so it was a good deal.
We had a few beach days, we also went to Paradise Cove for a luau which was awesome (for our anniversary), we also went to the zoo the same day, we went to the aquarium, pearl harbor, USS Arizona Memorial, Dole Plantation, North Shore, the Blow Hole, A lot of really awesome lookouts, Diamond Head, yes I hiked all the way up with Abigail strapped to me! We hung out with Vinnie's cousin, had some really great dinners and did some shopping in several shopping centers including the International Market. We did a lot and there is more to write, but my pizza will be here soon so got to go!
Thursday, August 12, 2010
Vinnie still has some leave time so we are just relaxing at home most of the time, tomorrow we are going to try to play some basketball and maybe some soccer, we'll see how Abigail enjoys it.
Hopefully later I'll have more time to write about Hawaii because I'd really like to get all the stuff down that we did.
Ok, not much of a post, but I'm trying to at least update a little bit! Bye!
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Anyway, I shouldn't complain, he's home, he's here and everything is awesome. Abigail took to Vinnie awesomely. The homecoming was very late and Abigail was super tired, but she didn't cry at all when she saw Vinnie and she let him hold her no problem.
He's been very hands on with her and she adores him. It is really great. I'm hoping we will get some time to relax, we are going to Hawaii so that should help, but I can't believe he is already back at work :/
I can't wait to get our pictures! I took "deployment" pictures with a professional photographer and also had homecoming pictures with another photographer, FOR FREE! I am really excited to see the pictures since I only got a couple taken with my iPhone.
Well, I'm going to go rest now and get ready for Vinnie to be home in maybe 3 hours...:/ 4pm, retarded, ok I said I was done complaining,
byebye for now!
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
My mind is just all junked up and I can't think clearly anymore. I have exhausted my list of things to do and now I have nothing to do today while I sit and wait. I have super cleaned 3 or 4 times now, I don't think there is anything left to clean.
I was really hoping I wouldn't be alone in the bed tonight, but it looks like it will be at least one more night. I got a call from Vin this morning, so I'm guessing that means at least another day :(
BTW the Donut of Misery can kiss my butt. You know how many times I've changed the date on that thing? Ugh, now it just makes me angry when I see the 376 number.
Well, I don't have much else to say except I can't wait until I can stop complaining and post something happy. Soon, pretty soon I hope.
Sunday, July 11, 2010
So, I decided to go clean crazy today and I got a lot done, this house looks awesome. I had to flea bomb it again, I hope it works this time, I hate fleas and they love me. If they don't leave me alone this time I'm going to have to get a pro.
Well, I'm actually pretty tired, I was going to write more, but I still need to eat din din. Ok bye bye!
Saturday, July 10, 2010
I am jealous and this blog is mostly a jealous rage!
And no offense to single soldiers, but shouldn't soldiers with wives and children come home first? I mean, my husband left one month before Abigail was born and came home for R and R when she was a month old for 2 weeks. I found out some guys got to come home for the birth for E-leave and THEN also got 2 weeks R and R later on, ugh. Last time he saw her she was just a little tiny baby and now she is ready to walk and I'm trying to keep her from walking so he can see it, and then he gets pushed back... It has been 10 months since I have even seen my husband, other guys haven't even deployed for that long AND they got R and R, AND they are coming home before my hubby! Those guys should have to wait, sorry, I know I shouldn't say that, but this is a blog and I'm allowed to write how I feel, right?
Anyway, I'm hoping that if I complain and just expect him not to be home for awhile, then I will finally get the call that he's coming.
Well, I am done for now, maybe I'll get the call tonight?
Saturday, July 3, 2010
-Friend, I really hope this post is not upsetting, I have no intention of upsetting you or make you questions yourself, your doctors or anything, I know you can't go back or change anything that happened, just know I think about you, your husband and your little one everyday and well, i just want you to know that.
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Even though i am so freakin happy for my friend, it makes me very anxious and impatient for my husband's return. I just wish he would have been on the same flight, he leave about a week and a half after her husband, but it looks like he'll go over the year mark by a few days :( But, I guess I can look at it on the positive side, it's not a 15 month deployment, so that's good. I just have to keep telling myself he's coming eventually.
The weather has been f-ing awesome this week. I am so happy, I hope it is really nice when Vinnie comes home, I want him to really be able to enjoy himself.
so, I'm gonna do some bashing for a minute, just to get it off my chest. A girl I know from high school is out here in Washington, her husband is Army. They got a compassion reassignment to here so their son can have better care. That's all fine and well. Then, she starts talking about how he hasn't deployed and has been in for 4 years! are you kidding me? That's crazy! His unit out at Ft. Drum deployed, but he got out of it. she said she called the governor and shiz! I mean, really? Do your f-ing duty, you signed up for this, at a time of war it means you go to war, that's just the way it is. The only people allowed to complain are those doing multiple deployments bc there are f-ing guys out there who haven't done one and people who have done 5! Ridiculous. That isn't even what peeves me though. So, they come out here with the assumption that he won't deploy for a year bc of the CA, well, apparently that's not how it works and he is going to deploy in October, I understand being upset I guess, but if they would have done their homework they would have known this and not expected to get out of it. Anyway, deployments suck, I know it, but don't complain if you've had 4 consecutive non-deployment years together, don't think your situation is special and you deserve special treatment. People deploy under not-ideal circumstances all the time! Vinnie left a month before his baby was due, don't you think he would have liked to stick around? In fact, some guy in the Brigade called around and got a delay in his deployment so he could be there for the birth of his baby (same day as Abigail), I know Vinnie probably could have called around and tried getting a delay, but really, we knew he had to go and what kind of example would he set for his soldiers if he stayed behind? He realized his situation is not special, plenty of wives have babies while their husbands are gone. Also, my friend had a tragedy during this deployment happen to her family, did they let her husband stay behind? No. He did his job, as hard and difficult as it was, the unit wasn't very compassionate or understanding and their situation actually was not typical and things should have been handled differently, but he left because it was his job and this was his 3rd deployment. Yet, we got little whiny boy who I know is at home whining about having to deploy. grrrr. I hate to rag on people, but sometimes, it is needed.
Sorry again. I really am not usually bad like that, but when I think of all the people who go through deployments when circumstances are not ideal and do it multiple times and then you have people who whine because they have to go once after 4 years of service? Ok, I'll go now before I really start looking nasty. I know as an officer's wife i should write like this about people. Good thing only one other person reads this! haha
Friday, June 18, 2010
I was feelin so good I decided I'd brave pay day and make a trip to Wally World for groceries and misc. items. So, we went. I had Abigail in the baby carrier bc I knew I'd need the whole cart to shop. She did really awesome, I was so happy. After shopping I stopped to pick up some Micky D's on the way home. Got home, gave Abigail a snack and brought in all the stuff via laundry baskets. Then, I ate lunch, fed Abigail lunch and put away all the groceries.
Then, I decided to try to finish up hanging things in the office. We have a ton of stuff, all this White sox stuff, but now, it is all hung up, I also put the posters up in the guest bathroom. Even though I eyeball stuff and measure nothing, everything looks pretty good.
Abigail was in a good mood and it was super nice outside, so me and Abigail went to the park. First, I had her sit with me while swinging, which is what we usually do, but I thought maybe she's ready for the baby swing. I put her in it and she was soo excited, it was so cute.
I got home and played with the dogs for a little while and did some laundry and the dishes. I put laundry and dishes away and vacuumed and cleaned. I cleaned abigail's carseat and high chair.
I gave abigail dinner, gave her a bath and then put her to bed. Then, i went through all our bills, paperwork and all that stuff and organized it and filed some things away.
I just took the dogs out again, fed and watered . I then cleaned up all their poo outside, three dogs = a lot of poo. and now i am ready to eat my dinner. What a day, what a day.
I forgot to add that I watched the US world cup game and the white sox game. Freakin awesome. Too bad the US goal didn't count and no one knows why, but they still had an awesome comeback and the white sox pulled out an extra inning victory!
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
These last couple weeks have taught me one thing for sure. I think I may have been able to handle staying in washington for the deployment. Yes, it would have been hard at times, but I think I could have done it. I am glad I went home, and we now have a freakin awesome house so, I'm not complaining. Well, that's all for now!
I complain about my dogs, a lot, but they really do stress me out. I know the only way to make things better is to not have so many, but I also can't bring myself to getting rid of any :( I think the only way it would work is if someone in my family would take them, then I know they'd be cared for and I'd still be able to see them. But, I also know if I'm not going to do anything about it, I should stop complaining. I know it drives Vinnie mad, for one he isn't here so he can't fix the problem and for two I won't fix the problem, so it's just craziness. It seems like everyday I have a new adventure with them (not in a positive way), It's just so tiring.
The real point of this post was to talk about Abigail, which I have kind of avoided doing on this blog since there is only one person that reads this that I know of and I don't want to rub my baby in her face, but in this case I'm going to say some things. When Abigail was first born up until she was about 4 months old I complained, a lot, about her not sleeping, I mean she never, EVER slept, I am not making this up, I'm talking she'd do 2 hours max, a day, including the night. Anyway, it really stressed me out and I actually went crazy at one point (when she was about 2 months) which I could blame on the hormones I suppose. Anyway, to get back on track, I don't usually regret things I do or say because they happened and there isn't anyway to change it, but I regret that complaining, it was pointless, I was hit with the hard reality, through a friend, that I need to just count my blessings and stop the whining. I had been doing a good job with it, but found myself complaining again last night, to this friend... shame on me. I want this to be an apology for that, I am trying to avoid the whining, it honestly comes natural to me, and I am sorry for whining to you.
Anyway, I have been having a lot of fun in Washington since being back, only a few more weeks until Vinnie returns. I am going to try to stay on top of this blog a little bit better, maybe I'll get some followers? Ha, yeah right, I'd put it on facebook but I don't want my family reading it. I kinda want to use it as a place to complain about them, ha there I go again!
Tuesday, May 11, 2010
I have made goal, but this week reminded me that is isn't ALWAYS easy to stay on track, but I do know I can get back on, to recap the week...
So, my weigh in day is Tuesday, I always pig out afterward, it's just what I do, it usually has no effect on my weight loss and allows be to really indulge on whatever I want for a night, I think it actually is helpful because typically, during the week I will want something bad and say to myself, save it for Tuesday, well, I can only have so much on Tuesday so I know I am saving myself a lot of not so good options by doing it this way, anyway, I am going to list the day of the week and the not so good choices I made this week, because, I was really bad...
Tuesday...KFC 3 pieces of chicken (2 fried, 1 grilled) mashed potatoes w/gravy and cole slaw
Wednesday...KFC leftovers and buttery popcorn (went to the movies, got a small popcorn, but then got a refill :( Oh I almost forgot, went to Olive Garden and had soup, salad, breadsticks, only one breadstick, otherwise not too bad, but again, I would normally only do this if I had saved points and had been on point all week.
Thursday... Decided for some reason I deserved something not good from BK, had a tendercrisp and fries, wasn't really worth it, but brought back memories from college, reminded me of sitting at the IMU watching Sportcenter and bowling class while studying for my next class..I miss IU...anyway, I realize I prefer McDonald's fries...I also went out to eat at a Mexican restaurant...love Mexican food, wasn't my choice to go there, family was celebrating, otherwise I would have been smarter during the day, anyway, I had shrimp fajitas, so not too bad, avoided the cheese and sour cream, but had a generous helping of chips and salsa
Friday...I was pretty good, until my dad ordered pizza for dinner, which still isn't that bad, but not so good considering how the week was going
Saturday...went to lunch with my mom at Red Robin, yep had a chicken Burger and fries, not the first time I have had this meal while on WW, but usually I have been pretty on point during the week
Sunday...Mother's Day, my first, so I convinced myself I could have whatever I want. For some reason we had a Chinese potluck at my grandma's house around 12, so yep ate all that including an eggroll and a few crab rangoons, lots of rice too. Then I went out to dinner with my family at Longhorn Steakhouse. Normall I avoid appetizers and bread, etc, but like I said I had convinced myself that this week was already dead so I at a lot of Texas Tonion, had some bread WITH BUTTER! my entree was a Filet Mignon and sweet potato, not so bad.
Monday..Pretty good during the day besides the McDonald's fries I had with my salad lol. At night, of coarse it was pizza again (my family loves that stuff) and I ate 3 pieces of pepperoni pizza ad half a breadstick
So, looking back I cant believe I let myself go. My family eats out A LOT as you can tell, usually not a problem, I have never gone a week without losing weight, I don't know what I'll weigh tonight, but I may have to use that no weigh in pass, I'm almost at Lifetime too, I will be back on, starting tonight, I'm gonna have healthy pig out tonight instead of eating junk...thinking Jimmy John's? Well, wish me luck on getting back on track!
Monday, April 26, 2010
First problem, my mom is still married and she has a boyfriend and has had one for like 5 or 6 years, I know gross. She won't get a divorce and since my dad isn't the one who "left" he doesn't want on either since he knows he'll have to give mom money, house, or whatever. The thing is, my dad used to live in the house because it was my mom who wanted to leave. My brother went kinda nutty his sophomore year and so my mom moved back in and my dad went to an apartment. My dad couldn't afford to pay for an apartment and a house (my mom was paying for the apartment but then stopped) so he had to move out and now lives in a room in somebody's house while paying for the house we live in. Ok, not really that big of a deal, lots of guys have to do that, the issue? The dude basically lives here. He has his own house, but he sleeps here every night, I have to see his scrubby ass come down the stairs every morning which usually results in waking up Abigail (making me pretty angry). He basically steals my mom from me too. My mom has always been a smoker, but the dude is a heavy duty smoker and since she's been with him she smokes A LOT more than before. It's nice that she only smokes upstairs so it's not around Abigail, but I hardly ever see my mom. Her and the dude go have a smoke like every 15-30minutes. He is also her dance partner and so they go to dance lessons and dances during the week and on the weekend. Now, it's all good that my mom goes out and has fun, but she goes out a lot and it out really late, yet when she doesn't go out she goes to bed all early because she's tired and will not hang out with me. typically she'll get home from work say hi to Abigail and then go get ready to go out. I see her about 15 minutes a day, yet she said she's all sad that we are leaving soon, maybe she should stay home more so we can hang out. The dude also does not respect my moms diet at all, i sweat i don't know how that guy isnt 400lbs, he eats like crazy. My mom has been doing the Atkins diet for about 7 years or so and even thought i dont think it's the best diet it has worked for her, so basically she isn't supposed to eat carbs right? Apparently this dude is Alton Brown or some shit and makes tons of stuff my mom cant eat, usually dessert and makes her eat it. What did he make for dinner last night? Freakin spaghetti and breadsticks! What the hell? I feel bad because I know my mom s upset about it, but she doesn't say anything. He also butts his head in everything, telling me what i should be feeding abigail and stuff, him and my mom even gave her ice cream when she was babysitting, I was pretty pissed about it, not because of the ice cream but maybe I wanted to be there when she tried ice cream the first time. I don't want that guy and his dirty hands touching my abigail, he is seriously so freakin dirty. My mom doesn't even ask if it's ok, I should just tell her, but I don't want to make my mom mad, she is no fun at all for days on end if she's mad. The dude also eats my pizza. Sounds stupid but see I will order a pizza every once in awhile and save leftover for lunch the next day. Him and ma will come to the house in the middle of the night and fatty will eat the rest of my pizza. I have even puts notes on it before. First of all, it's not his house, and it's not his pizza I freakin paid for it! It'd be different if he asked, like "Hey can I have a piece of your pizza?" but no he just eats it, and not just a piece, the whole thing and he thinks it's funny. He has cracked jokes about how he ate my pizza. The other day Amanda ordered the pizza and he came in the house and at two pieces! grrr On top of that my sister is getting married next summer and my dad, mom and the dude need to get this figured out before then. Holidays are already weird because now we go with the dude to my aunt's house. My dad and the dude haven't met. If my mom and dad had just settled this 5 years ago it'd be no big deal by now. My dad cant even come to family functions because the dude is there and mom won't let them collide. My cousin Gary got married i think two years ago and my dad couldn't come. Now you have to realize Gary is like another son to my dad, my mom and dad have been married like 25 years my dad has no brothers or sisters and so my moms brothers and sisters are his family and now he is cut off. My uncle died and he couldnt come to the funeral. I mean, seriously. Well, I'm done for now, my rage is building up. I will stop for now, but I think you can get the idea. Nighty night!
Saturday, April 24, 2010
Things are starting to move along with the whole moving back to Washington thing. Well, I say that yet I haven't really made any progress. I almost had a house a week and a half ago, but then the lady sold it. I applied for a house in Dupont, but now we are thinking it doesn't really work for us. Then I called about a few other places, but have been disappointed over and over again. For example, no fenced yard even though it says fenced yard, people have decided not to rent but rather to sell, or the house is already taken. I finally found a place that I think would be perfect for us. I called and asked if it was available, they said yes, so I started getting all excited, sent in an application, they said everything looked good but we'd know for sure in 24 hours, then about 5 minutes later I get a call saying there was a miscommunication and they had promised another couple the first showing of the house on Monday at 10am. So, now I gotta wait until then to find out. Meanwhile, I have tried getting another house lined up. I guess I wouldn't mind the backup house and I'm prepared for it since i've been let down so far. It's in a really nice neighborhood, smaller, but cheaper. It doesn't have a real yard, it has a patch of grass and patio that is fenced in, but it is right next to a couple parks and trails, so it'd be nice for us.
I just want it to be over so I can start making more plans. I need to book movers, get a trailer for the truck, book flights, pack things, and who knows what else, I have a very long list. I know I still have to figure out how to get from the airport to the storage unit to get my car. I'm gonna have to jump it so I'll need someone with a car and jumper cables, even though I might have some in the car, I'm not sure.
Well, I'll go now, just wanted to share a little.
Thursday, April 8, 2010
So, I have been having this back and forth dilemma regarding my dogs for quite awhile now. Just thinking about doing another move with the dogs is making me tired. Plus, Vinnie and I are going to want to take a trip and we'll either have to board them all or get a pet-sitter or something. If we were normal, like we had planned to be when we got the dogs, I could handle them, we wouldn't be living across the country wanting or needing to come home every once in awhile or have to move because the Army says so or desperately need a vacation because we have been separated for a year. But, that's not what happened. I LOVE my dogs, I really do, I wish I were a better owner, but things just haven't gone the way we thought they were going to go when we went crazy and ended up with three dogs. If only we had stopped at Hoosier things would be ok, but Yoda was so irresistibly cute, I'm not kidding and I know we saved Charles from being euthenized, no one wanted him and it was so sad. We really shouldn't have gotten a third dog but really the difference of 2 and 3 isn't much. One dog would be so much easier. I just don't want to give them up forever because i know someday we will be settled again and be normal and then I would want my puppies back. I wouldn't want a stranger to have them because I'd be scared they'd end up at a shelter. I just need a couple friends or family members to take one or both of my doggies into their home. They are good dogs, for real. It would be like an open adoption, I want to be able to see pictures and stuff and then if I feel i'm ready to have them back I could come get them. I know that isn't really realistic. That's why it's so frustrating. Well, that's all i'm gonna write tonight, i need to go to sleep i'm so tired but thoughts of everything keep running through my mind and I can't settle down!
Tuesday, March 30, 2010
I'm a little tired so I don't think I'm going to write much, in fact I know it. So, I guess I'll go now, I just wanted to share my excitement!
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
The other night my roommate and I were extremely hungry. As we search our empty cabinets we came across the devil in disguise, Fiber One Chocolate Chip Bars. We are not sure how they got there but we went in for the kill. To our surprise it was some of the most tastiest snacks to hit our lips. After we devoured our first bar we quickly moved on to our second. Before the night was over I had sucked down 3 while my roommate hit up 5.
The next morning our assholes were blowing more gas than Mobil. It was AMAZING!!!! Never before did I think human can fart as much as I did. I’m a teacher and literally had to run out into to the hall, fart real quick and go back in and finish the lesson. Along with that I was crop dusting the shit out of my students, and making them take the blame for the stink. My roommate experienced similar issues. He works in close quarters to other co-workers and unfortunately they experienced the wrath of Fiber One as well. He tried to hold it in as best as possible, but it’s like trying to plug an erupting volcano. We couldn’t believe it!!!! By the end of the day, we estimated that we farted over 500 times combined. No joke whatsoever - I have absolutely no reason to lie about such an embarrassing day in my life.
If you don’t believe me, then put yourself to the test. I personally dare you to try having 3 of these bad boys, or better yet shoot for 6. This is no fucking joke, I seriously thought I had to go to the emergency room.
Monday, March 15, 2010
Started a workout class today, only cost $5 and it's basically a personal training session because it's just me, my sister and this other chick. Sweet! I have another (different) class on Thursday, I don't know how many are in that class so we'll see.
I weigh in tomorrow. I've been doing really well this week I think so hopefully I'll be in the 130's tomorrow! Wow, it's been a long time since I've been there. I gotta lose two pounds though, so that's kinda a lot. When I get to 137 I'll no longer be overweight, so exciting, almost there. Alright, I need to get to bed now. Night night
Saturday, March 13, 2010
I finally worked out today, it felt good. I signed up for a couple of classes that i knew my mom would be able to babysit during. One is a basic core class the other is called Yoga ball...sounds...interesting.
Well, I don't have much else to talk about so i guess i'll go!
Friday, March 12, 2010
So tonight, I'll be alone again. I just get excited around 5:30ish because that's when my mom usually gets home. I get about 5 minutes to hang out with her until she starts getting ready to go out. So that sucks too, plus she doesn't get home until REAL late, which sometimes wakes up the babe and always waked up me because well, I sleep on the couch, yep, the couch. I've been sleeping on the couch for the last couple of months. I just wish I got to hang out with my mom more, she doesn't seem to really want to hang with me, she'd much rather go out. Although the other day she said, "I'm gonna miss you when you go back to Washington, I'm already sad thinking about it" I'm thinking to myself, "well, i've been home since October and I have hardly seen you at all" I told her she should come back to Washington with me when I go back, she said she probably would. Yay! I will get to hang out with my mom WITHOUT the "dude" I don't even want to get into the "dude" discussion right now, but I will fill everyone in later on. I like hanging out with my mom. When she came to Washington for two weeks it was AWESOME! Well, I gotta go for now, I may add some more later.